Sonic The Hedgehog (2020) Spoiler-Filled Review/Rant: Not Fast Enough For Laziness...

I should start off this review by stating my thoughts on the Sonic franchise as a whole. To be fair, I used to love the franchise as a kid, playing "Sonic Heroes" on my Xbox, and to this day, enjoy the cast of characters and the "Sonic Boom" cartoon. I wouldn't say that I'm casual though, since I haven't played a game from the franchise for years, mainly due to poor quality or the gameplay just not appealing to me. I had some low expectations for this film due to the lack of talent behind the scenes and how the trailers didn't really get me excited, despite the redesign of Sonic. However, when the positive feedback came out, I started to get a bit excited. The truth is though, leaving the cinema, I felt pretty underwhelmed. I could just simply say that I enjoy the film so that the Sonic fans don't lynch me, but I love film in general, and when I notice a really flawed film, I must call it out. I also need to spoil some things, since that's where the issues are resided, whether they are critical plot points or things that the marketing doesn't push in order to keep people from cringing.

Positives:

• Let's address the best thing of the film: Jim Carrey! I missed his charisma on-screen and the film gave him a nice chance to return to his over-the-top ways. Surprisingly, he never made me cringe in the film at all. He might be a bit too zany and not resemble Dr. Robotnik with his fake-looking mustache, but he was just so fun to watch. I also like that he's a beta version of the character as his technology and character design haven't evolved yet to the more recognizable Dr. Eggman and his robotic army.
• Sonic was also pretty enjoyable (for the most part). Ben Schwartz does a nice job with his vocal performance and the animation on him is really good. I'm not really the biggest fan of the character personality-wise, but in this film, I can see that they were trying to make him a child-like figure, despite the adult voice coming out from him. He does have some fun moments such as the scene where he's in the bar, but there's one huge negative with him that I will address later.
• The soundtrack is pretty good. I was afraid that the producers were going to play some overrated, modern, trash songs like "Old Town Road", but they surprisingly used songs that haven't been beaten down to death from the radio. The original score by Junkie XL is decent for the film it was made for, which is light-hearted adventure/comedy, though the piano theme of the theme song at the end was nice.
• The few good laughs I can get out of the film, such as the fungi pun and Sonic trying to beat a big guy up. Robotnik also has some decent lines as well.
• The references to the franchises that offer nice easter eggs and teases for those who are seasoned with the franchise. Tails was also a nice treat for the mid-credits.

Negatives:

• Where do I start with the negatives but with the opening for the film? I have to say, this is the worst opening to a film I have seen for a long time. The problem starts where Baby Sonic meets his guardian, Longclaw, a female owl who looks much more realistic than the cartoon hedgehog. Before you can get used to the design, the two are suddenly attacked out of nowhere by ecidnas (no Knuckles in sight). Longclaw gives Sonic a bag of teleporting rings and chooses to get killed when there was clearly enough time for her to leave with Sonic. The issue with this opening is that things happen way too fast and start off the film with so many questions. Who is Longclaw and how come she adopted Sonic? Why are the ecidnas trying to kill a child for no reason? Why did Longclaw not leave with Sonic when she had enough time to go into the portal? The opening feels so disconnected from the film that I don't get why they even bothered to show it, other than to have a reason for more merchandise with Baby Sonic. It doesn't help that the opening is tonally more intense than the rest of the film and feels like it came out from a different movie altogether. I know that this is the lore, but couldn't they have fleshed this out? Another plot-hole I would like to address is that Sonic causes the conflict because he for some reason kept running in a circle for being upset from his loneliness? Pretty bizarre way to get the movie going.
• The rest of the human cast. James Marsden as Tom Wachowski is bland as butter. Outside of "Westworld", I can never get invested in this guy and he feels so generic in this film. He's your typical everyman that's nice to Sonic, despite him being really annoying. Never seen that before, huh? His arc is pretty dull, with him questioning to leave his small town to San Fransisco, which Sonic gets really offended of for barely any reason. I understand the theme they are presenting, but Tom kind of has no reason to stay home, since leaving would be better for his career and life in the long run. The people of Green Hills are more annoying or stupid than charming, so they never really offer much to stay behind. The side characters are also forgettable and dull such as Tom's wife that does nothing, Tom's sister-in-law that hates him, and his really braindead friend at the police station. I know this is a family film, but these people are more childish than actual children.
• The humour. I won't judge the overall tone, since it's more geared towards families, but the comedy is pretty dry. There are a few good chuckles, but the issue with the comedy is that most of the jokes are pop-culture references or product placements. Olive Garden is a gross place to eat in, so why does Tom have an app for it and why does the general congratulate him for the events of the film by giving him a $50 gift card? Because it's stupid. However, what I find worse is Sonic's never-ending pop culture references. I know what you're thinking. How does Sonic know pop-culture when he is from another world? Well, the movie explains that he spent 10 years on Earth. This element of the plot allows Sonic to give out cringe-worthy line involving namedropping Keanu Reeves, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Vin Diesel, Find My Phone, taking selfies, and flossing. FLOSSING! Like, how pandering are these writers and producers are to modern culture?!?
• Jeff Fowler's directing. You can tell this was his first feature film, let alone live-action directional debut. The film looks and feels like a low-budget Disney Channel series. The cinematography, outside of the action sequences, are so flat and uninspired. I won't complain about the visual effects, since they aren't bad at all, but they clearly don't gel together at all. Sonic and Robotnik's drones are popping with colour compared to the grey, almost unfiltered world they inhabit in. The few moments of CGI environments that we do see are also nice to look at, that it makes me wish that this film was animated the whole time and not some live-action hybrid.
• The last, though the biggest, issue I have with this film is the overall laziness of the film. You can tell in many areas of the film that it felt so lazy in the writing department with barely any creativity. This is prominent with the story and utilization of the source material. I'm not talking about plot holes here, but the fact that this film feels very much like a first draft. The opening fits this with barely any time to address Sonic's past as well as how he needs to spend 10 years to pick up on disgusting pop-culture references. The plot however is just the typical buddy comedy where a strange character asks help from a boring male lead that bond a friendship in very short time with barely any conflict to each other outside of misunderstanding and such. Why couldn't the film be set in a brand new world that can be explored? Why can't we have more characters like Tails, Knuckles, Amy, Shadow, or others join the fun and have some cool interactions with each other and engaging human characters? Why does the subplot of Tom being viewed as a terrorist completely vanish and how come he doesn't react to the news at all? Why does Sonic stay on Earth at the end of the movie? He can defend himself now and return home, try to befriend the other creatures that misunderstood him years ago. Why is Tails even looking for Sonic if he has never met the guy and have no knowledge of him since he left when he was a baby 10 years ago? The best things in the film involve Sonic and Robotnik. When they are onscreen, it feels like the games coming to life. I understand that this is meant to be more like the first Sonic game when it comes to elements from the source material, but if so, why not include some of Sonic's power-ups or Robotnik's mech? I heard the argument about introducing more elements in sequels with larger budgets, but I have to compare this to "Detective Pikachu". That film could have easily just copy the generic formula of the titular character being sent to our world and needing help from a everyman to get him back home. But, they actually try to put effort in using the source material and give us a new world as well as allowing us to see beloved creatures from the franchise other than Pikachu, while also offering triple amount the easter eggs and references on the side. It's not a perfect film, mind you, but I can say without a doubt that they tried so hard on that film, when the filmmakers here didn't even try with the original design of Sonic whatsoever.

 I really wanted to join the bandwagon on this, especially for a video-game adaptation. Heck, I want to be in the majority to avoid being argued upon. But, I have to be honest and address my honest take. Although I very much enjoyed Carrey's Robotnik, Sonic's characterization, soundtrack, the good bits of humour that can be salvaged, and the references/easter eggs, this film is a complete mess. From a laughable cold opening, dull human characters who aren't Robotnik, cringe-worthy humour that consists of product placements and pop-culture references, Frowler's amateur directorial debut, and the overall laziness in the screenplay regarding the massive missed potential of making a much better film. I know that all of the die-hard fans are planning to lynch me and ignore my criticisms, since they just wanted to see their beloved character on the big screen. I end off with this. I love the Hitman franchise and love to see Agent 47 in more mainstream media such as live-action films. I however can't defend how poorly made the Hitman films are. Sure, I can enjoy the 2015 film from time to time, but I will admit the various issues it has. I believe though that addressing issues in these films offer a lesson to these inexperienced directors, producers, and screenwriters that they must try harder in making movies like these. And if you praise heavily-flawed films like these, chances are that sequels and other adaptations are going to inherit movie-breaking issues.

Verdict: 5/10. I can't say this is an awful film, but it is one with crippling flaws that the qualities aren't enough to call it good either. Regardless, I still recommend a watch if you love the franchise, but be more mindful on how the film is overall, not what the main characters look like.